Back-to-School Clothes Shopping? Moms & Dads, Keep this in Mind!

If you’re the parent of a teenage girl, what you teach your daughter regarding the clothes she wears and how she presents herself will greatly impact both her success and the way she connects with the opposite sex.  If you’re the parent of a teenage boy, discussing this article with him may open his eyes to taking responsibility for how a woman should be treated, in spite of what she might be wearing.

Here’s the bottom line:  The results of a brain-scan study conducted by male Princeton University students revealed that when men are shown pictures of scantily-clad women, the regions of the brain that are associated with tools, such as screwdrivers and hammers, light up.  “The pictures of bikini-clad women activated brain regions associated with objects or ‘things you manipulate with your hands,’” Princeton psychology professor Susan Fiske said.  She went on to say that she believed these images may dehumanize women and encourage men to see them as objects. “You have to be aware of the effect of these images on people,” Fiske explained. “They’re not neutral. They do have an effect on how people think about other women.” (see http://bit.ly/17QoV9U).

Jessica Rey, actress and designer of a new attractive and modest swimwear line, believes that although the popularity of the bikini, for example, has been attributed to the "power of women," (see http://bit.ly/17t8zVU), the bikini can make women powerless:

"Bikinis really do inspire men to see women as objects — as something to be used, rather than as someone to connect with. So it seems that wearing a bikini does give a woman power: the power to shut down a man's ability to see her as a person, but rather as an object. This is surely not the kind of power women were searching for — the power to be treated as an equal, to be seen as ‘in control’ and to be taken seriously. It seems the power they were searching for is more attainable when they dress modestly."

Proponents argue it is society that teaches boys and reinforces the idea from infancy that women are, in fact, sexual “tools”.  But I disagree.  I think we are all born selfish - with a desire to only meet our own desires (anyone with children knows you do not have to teach a child to lie or be greedy or selfish). We must, therefore, teach our children to be kind, compassionate, respectful, and to care about the health and welfare of others. The problem, in my opinion, is not that we, as a society, teach boys or girls to act the way they do, the problem is that we do NOT – as PARENTS - teach boys and girls to act the way they SHOULD.

Keeping into account the fact the U.S. has the HIGHEST rate of sexual crimes in the entire world – four times higher than the next closest nation (see http://bit.ly/16f8m9T), do we blame men for the way they view and respond to women, or do we blame women for the way we project ourselves?  With which gender should we begin to effect positive change – so that our children can influence a more sexually healthy and safe environment?

I think both. Women – even young women - should dress in a way that pleases THEMSELVES. When we dress provocatively, we are dressing - either consciously or subconsciously - to please men. Men do not "teach" their brains to respond the way they do... the "tool" sector of the brain is automatically engaged when a woman presents those parts of her body that can be "used" as such.

On the other hand and knowing this, men – even young men - should put forth effort to recognize the disconnect, and should always treat a lady like a lady - even if she doesn't dress like one.

Parents, how will YOUR young ladies dress for school this year?